I’ve had this one bra that has fit me perfectly for years. It’s so comfortable. Though the underwire is totally broken and peeps through frequently, though the straps fall down my shoulders every 10-minutes and though it really has no shape left, it’s perfect in every way. When I wear it, my underarms aren’t squished, I don’t feel like I’m being choked and it makes any style of t-shirt look good (unless, of course, those deep v-necks. How do people even wear those without a tank top underneath? Everything shows).
Today, I had it in me to go bra shopping (possibly the most annoying task any person ever has to do). So, I walked into La Vie en Rose, a Canadian retailer, and went straight to the back of the boutique, ignoring all the hideous black and red Valentine’s Day lingerie that looked cheaper than a Hallowe’en costume purchased at Ardène, also a Canadian company. (N.B. I’m not hating on Canadian companies, I’m just stating facts regarding the origin of said stores).
After essentially groping a few bras, and feeling mounds of padding and lacy straps that would make my shoulders super itchy, I was ready to give up. “Whatever,” I thought. “I like my current ‘good’ bra. Who says I have to give it up just because it’s old?” Well, just then, a sales person approached me and asked me what I was looking for (I assume she could see the look of distress on my face). I told her I was looking for a comfy, everyday, product and not something with too much padding because I, well, enjoy breathing.
She asked for my size, and when I said what I thought it was, the sales person looked at me like I was unintelligent. What? When I shop here my bra size is this but when I go elsewhere, it’s something entirely different. Maybe I’m not the one with the size problem!
The one bra I was eyeing didn’t exist in my size, so I was then directed to the back wall scattered entirely with multicoloured microfoam bras: These massive, soft-feeling, boob-holders with so much cloth that someone without much bra knowledge may have thought are for pregnancy or playing sports. Not to mention, the straps on these things are like an inch-and-a-half wide. What kind of shirt am I supposed to wear with such things? Turtle necks?
“Try one of these,” the sales person said. “I know it looks like a lot of material, but I swear it’s so comfortable. And, it’s so soft.”
Before I knew it, I was in the change room (or change curtain, I should say) and taking off my scarf, my winter coat, my sweater and my tank top. I struggled into the microfoam bra, that was navy blue and wouldn’t have worked well with any clothing light in colour, and looked in the mirror. The cloth covering the breast area was way too close to my collar bone and my armpits were squished. At this point, I was going to pack up and make my way to the nearest department store to get something less awkward and squishy.
Before I could, though, the sales person asked, “How does it fit?” “Umm,” I said. “It’s tight.” Within a minute, I had a beige coloured microfoam bra in my hands that was once size up. Though this one fit a bit better, I still felt like I was choking on my own body parts. Plus, I looked like an uncomfortable Wonder Bra model, the one you never see on bra packages because the photo proofs are thrown out and the model is never contacted again.
After re-dressing, I thanked the lady for her time and wished her a good day, then darted directly into Sears, where I found perfect fit and comfort all on my own (or so I hope…new bras can never really be trusted).
I’m still dreading the next time I have to go out and get a bra. A good bra is hard to come by, even though sometimes we get lucky and can find them on the first try. Plus, a good bra is always hard to depart from. None of your clothes ever feel the same after switching to a new bra. Trust me, new bra feeling is not as awesome as new car smell. When wearing a new bra, it feels like everyone notices. Clothes don’t fall the same way and sometimes the clasps at the back are not as well-functioning as they should be. Ever been the victim of a snapped bra strap? More often than not, it happens after buying a new bra. A good bra never breaks your trust.
This video by bowiechick also shares my hatred for bra shopping:
Do you strongly dislike any form of shopping?